HAPPY BIRTHDAY HELEN

You might have gathered from the title of today's post that it's my birthday so I appreciate all efforts to make today in its entirety all about me. Yes, please!!! This is exactly what I have threatened my family and friends with and I can not for the life of me count the number of people rooting for this day to be over even before it has started. In my opinion, I have had way too much fun demanding this level of attention as opposed to sulking every year on my birthday thinking of how old I am turning. This year has been so good and Tiffany Hudson's "Been So Good" summarizes how I feel today. 

I subtly remember starting a tradition of putting out a blog post every year on my birthday save for last year when I barely had the time to think it was my birthday because work and school hardly gave me the time. I can say for a fact that I feel way better writing it this year than I have in the last three years. Today again, I am typing away aggressively on my keyboard a few hours before my birthday and musing on how grateful I am for another year-long journey of growth, hard work, and determination with just a dash of surprises. I am not rambling or writing a gratitude journal grumbling my way through it because of any half and half miracles. If anything my anxiety is nowhere near the ceiling this year and I am dealing with everything in stride with my zen intact. It has come as a surprise because every year around this time I am a ball of anxiety, I mean a basket case of nerve-racking and idle thinking. It is no wonder my blood pressure is constantly in limbo towards this period. I have gotten the courage to put aside delayed gratification and celebrated my life much too many times this year which is something we should learn. The world will constantly dictate to you that other things are important but it takes courage to yank your hand back everything and say you are what comes first. Work, family, and school will still be there but you will have taken a much-needed breather and come back stronger to face them. This year I took a trip to celebrate today and texted my friend a few days ago telling her how this was the best decision I have made yet. It does help that I am being spoiled, pampered and having fun in a beautiful quaint city with love all around. 

I looked at my vision board a week ago and smiled because by Q2 I had achieved more than 80% of what I had on there. In relation to my bucket list, pocrescophobia is still dealing me a stronger hand and my brain can never wrap its head around what polyglots can do. I haven't learned any board games to even beginner-level talk more of pro-level and I don't I will ever because it might be too late for me. I am living vicariously through my dear friend K who is as a fine actor as they come considering no film, play or drama has presented itself to me to feature in. I cannot create a dream home just yet so let's check this box next year and I shall see that IKEA makes me a custom-made bookcase for said home.  You might probably have to go read BIRTHDAY 2020 to understand anything I have just written but what matters is that my bucket list is more than halfway through. In the months leading to this day, I have practiced a more relaxed manner of dealing with surprises and if you have read any of my newsletters I have explained what tremendous progress I have recorded. I cannot even believe how happy I have been this year and how much love I have received. I am constantly preaching about how much love has brought me this far and to think that it has;t paled in comparison to previous years is the most beautiful thing.

Take this with a pinch of salt or not but the year I turn this year is alarming, I am inclined to ask my mother how feasible it is to have birth records tampered with or switched. I cannot be this age and am ever ready to denounce it and work towards getting my real birth record. It is even worse when people don't believe I am a year older than 24 so I don't need to go by whatever my birth certificate says hence I am assuming a new age is more befitting if I might add. Reminiscing is one of my favorite pastime hence I have gone back in the years to read every birthday post and gratitude journal entry. I found this one part from the 2021 post and smiled. I have gone ahead to rewrite it but with a better conviction and thankful that I am in a better place BIRTHDAY 2021 

Another year and a half of my dreams have come through, the love of my life maybe by a stroke of luck is closer to me, my aspirations no longer feel bold and audacious for where I am coming from, my family growth is still my biggest prayer request but one ever-constant person who has kept me afloat and sane is God. I have checked the box again this year for everything I left in his hands; he held tight and never let go.

I have remembered that all my past difficult roads have led to the most beautiful destination. Here's to God who constantly blows my mind.

Happy birthday Helen

Your Favorite Birthday Girl

Helen Damilola 💕